We all know of the “strong” friend. The one who nothing really bothers because they know it’s most likely a temporary problem. They always know the logical & sensible thing to do. Everyone goes to them when they have a problem, but what about when they have a problem? For the most part, their problems are never really issues because they know how to deal with them right away & move on. But what about an ACTUAL issue? Depression, anxiety, loneliness etc?
It’s one thing to be considered the “strong” friend & have an issue, but it’s the absolute worst when you have an issue & you try to tell a friend about it & they brush it off. They’re used to dealing with everything on their own & aren’t used to going DEEP into things because normally they don’t have to. So what happens when they TRY to let it out & it’s brushed off? They shut down & no matter how long you two have been friends, just know it will never been the same.
If you have a “strong” friend who is trying to express their feelings, remember they’re trying something NEW. Obviously it’s something that doesn’t come naturally to them, and they’re trying their best. They came to you (just as you would normally go to them) just to have a shoulder to lean on. Whether it be to get advice, crying to you or even just sit in silence. It takes a lot of courage & vulnerability for these types of people. While for you it may be easy to let people in & let them know how you’re feeling, it’s an entirely new world for your friend. If you respond as “do you think you’re being dramatic” or “things never bother you so I didn’t think much of it”, just know, you’ve crossed the line of trust that will probably never be the same again. They took a chance on being open & asking for help and in that time of need instead of actually being present, you were dismissive.
The next time your strong friend comes to you with something think of this : How you would feel in that situation? Will it kill you just to listen, no matter how small it may seem to you? Have you thought of how many issues you’ve had that they helped you (or at least attempted) out of? How many times they probably had issues & didn’t want to disturb you? No matter how small the issue may be, if they felt bothered enough to reach out for help, wouldn’t it be apparent that this IS something serious? Especially since you KNOW it’s not in their character.
Just like you get tired, your strong friend does too. & when they do, make sure to try your best to be their crutch in their time of need.